Mary – Page 3

Starting Anew: What This Pandemic Can Teach Us

June 10, 2020 by Mary

While we have been in the shelter of our homes for the past two months, the winds of change have swirled around us; a new world before us-a new way of doing things, leaving the familiar seemingly unfamiliar. The old way has changed and as the world begins to step out onto our doorsteps and bravely look around, we must begin anew.

Perhaps a new way of doing things isn’t so bad, when we consider the cost of staying the same. This will one day be a time that our children and grandchildren talk about; a time like what has been foretold by those who have gone before us. Defying all of the odds, we will remain. God’s people are lifted high, the waters are parted, fishes and loaves are multiplied and we see miracles. Miracles in the sacrifice and kindness of our fellow man, miracles in overcoming hard things, miracles in the growing multitudes of people praying and slaying the bondage of fear that has gripped us so firmly, suffocating faith and doing the work of the enemy even as we hide away safely from the plague of this generation. All these miracles by the mercy and grace of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

And so it is–that as we start anew, we abide. We remain stable in our understanding of a God who is all knowing, all powerful and eternal. As His love for us is eternal, so too shall we walk in eternal faith, for it is not those things which we see, but the things unseen that we build our trust upon. They keep us abiding, waiting in patient expectancy as God’s people have done throughout the history of mankind. For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

Psalm 28:7 tells us:

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him.

This is the perfect time to put our trust in the Lord and release the burdens and worries of the modern day pandemics of sickness, despair, isolation and lack and REJOICE that we have a Savior that rejoices when we rejoice. Perhaps this starting anew thing is about exactly that…starting anew. Perhaps it’s time to renew our faith, spend time on our knees, and carve out recesses during our day to listen to His wise counsel on how to live our lives. Perhaps it’s time to fully commit our lives and surrender all that we have and all that we are to our merciful Savior. He shall strengthen your heart, all you that hope in the Lord. Psalm 31:24

His grace is sufficient for all. It’s sufficient in sickness and in health. His grace is sufficient in times of lack and times of plenty. His grace is made perfect in our weakness. If there were ever a time to call out to the Father and ask for His grace, it is now. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says, And he said unto me, “My grace is sufficient for you: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Let’s start anew. Let’s abide. Let’s rest in His grace.

Have hope friends. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.

xoxoxo.

Mary

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Soothing Words for Your Monday

May 11, 2020 by Mary

Some encouraging words for your Monday! I continue to hold you in prayer and hope that today finds you with a healthy body, healthy mind and a healthy spirit.

May God be a continual flow of fresh hope for you in the coming week, friends. When you feel afraid–read His words. Sink yourself deep into His promises. Another scripture verse that really resonates with me during this time is this:

Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her. Luke 1:45

This is not the time to throw in the towel, but rather, to move forward by faith with the promises God has laid upon our hearts.

God bless you, sweet friends. If you are looking for some HOPE and inspiration, here are some of my workbooks to work on through this time.

To join me on facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/hopefilledliving/

To join me on Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/hope_filled_living/

Stay safe. Be well. You are loved.

xoxoxo.

Cultivating Joy in the Midst of Hard Things

March 25, 2020 by Mary

Cultivating Joy

When we heard the words, “Vascular Ehlers- Danlos Syndrome”, our hearts dropped. As a mother, I think my heart may have stopped for a moment. Getting a diagnosis of Vascular Ehlers -Danlos Syndrome is like being told that you have Cancer and only so many days, weeks, months or years to live.

My daughter had just been given this grim diagnosis and all we could do was to look at one another and speak our unspoken language; the language that tells what words cannot express. “Don’t lose it, don’t lose it, keep it together, don’t let her see you cry” were the messages my brain was delivering to my thinking, feeling, hurting heart. I wanted to stay strong for her in that moment; she needed me to stay strong. We had talked about this day for a long time and tried to prepare ourselves that perhaps this would be Ashley’s medical reality; quietly holding out the hope that things could just be as they were and we could go on like normal.

As a praying woman, my days since her diagnosis are filled with even more prayer, gratitude for every simple thing, and cultivating joy. Cultivating joy because the other side of it are pain, fear, anger and sadness. Cultivating joy because my daughter deserves joy, cultivating joy because God is the author of joy. Cultivating joy because He is the Great I Am, the One Who IS and IS to come, the Great Physician, Healer of our transgressions and our Redeemer.

God sometimes gives us messages long before our hearts are ready to accept or understand them. All I know is that when something resonates with my heart, it’s usually because God is preparing me for something. Fourteen years ago, when we moved into our 150 year old Victorian home, we were in the beginning stages of seriously looking for a diagnosis for Ashley. I found a sign that reads, “Each Day is a Gift”. I don’t know why, but it was in tune with my heart and I hung it in our living room, where it has stayed for fourteen years.

“Each day is a gift”-sounds like a simple phrase, doesn’t it? Over the years, I have looked at the sign and acknowledged it, repeating, “each day is a gift”, but it never hit home as clearly as it does now. For me, the sign has been a reminder to give thanks and to be fully present with my family. Now my days are full of being present; present with the pain that our daughter lives with, present with her feelings of hopelessness on hard days, present with the love, compassion and empathy I feel for her, present with the intention of cultivating joy together. Present, that we may fully live.

Prior to going to Mayo Clinic, my husband and I knew something was terribly wrong, but we had faith that once we got to the bottom of it, there would be a way to fix it. That’s what parents always believe for our children. What parent wants to believe that there is no way to help your sick child to live the longest, healthiest, happiest life possible? “Of course there is a cure! Of course there is a way to fix it!”

Instead, what we have found is that joy helps us defeat the sadness of things we cannot control. Joy helps us to live in the moment. Joy helps us forget our deepest fears for a moment. Joy brings healing. Joy brings grace. Joy brings hope. Joy helps us honor the One who knows the number of our days.

Here are a few steps that I have learned along the way to living a life of cultivated joy:

It’s crucial to give thanks. Give thanks for the big things, the small things and everything in between.
Be present. Don’t live in the past, don’t meditate upon the future. Be fully present where you are now, on this day, in this moment.
Only the positive. We don’t have the luxury of a negative thought. Refute negative thoughts with positive, life giving thoughts. In recent years, my favorite scripture verse is: “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” Philippians 4:8 (KJV)
Let every breath be a prayer. We cannot remove ourselves from God. He is in every breath. Pray, always.
Keep your promises. Do what you say you are going to do and come through for people. Don’t let people down. Be a woman of your word. “Know therefore that the LORD thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;” Deuteronomy 7:9 (KJV)
Cultivate opportunities for joy. “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.” Proverbs 15:13 (KJV) Joy is a discipline, which becomes a habit through intention. We can choose to look at the gloomy side of life or we can be grateful and have a joyful heart and cheerful countenance.

Keep hope alive. God is still God. He still performs miracles. He is more than able to help us in every situation. He is never early, never late, but always right on time.

God bless you, friends. In the midst of hard things, cultivate joy as a daily practice in your lives and see how the Lord provides. His mercies are new each morning. He will never leave us, or forsake us. Don’t lose hope in the darkness and stop believing for your miracle.

When Less is More: Reflections On a Year of StILLNESS

February 2, 2020 by Mary

January, 2019 started with a sore throat that didn’t want to leave. After a throat culture, I was put on antibiotics for strep throat. The trouble with that is that once I completed the course of antibiotics, the sore throat was still with me. Culture after culture came back with the diagnosis of strep throat. Five courses of antibiotics only made me more ill and I still had a sore throat. Finally, I was referred to an immunologist who ran a ton of tests and revealed that I had chronic fatigue syndrome and that an old college friend had reared his ugly head and was the culprit of my longstanding sore throat and positive throat cultures! Chronic Epstein Barr Virus.

The frost laid itself heavy on the trees. I could feel winter settling into my bones. The house was always cold, so it seemed. This new medical revelation answered so many questions about my health throughout my life, since getting ill with EBV when I was a nineteen year old college student. By the time I met with the immunologist, my microbiome had been damaged from the many courses of antibiotics. There were days and weeks that I could barely hold down food and could only have soups and protein drinks. I saw my gastroenterologist and he ran another series of tests, where we discovered that my liver was affected by the antibiotics and was producing too much bile. He told me that it may repair itself or that it may be damaged for life and I would possibly have to be on medication for my liver for the rest of my life. I now have to have liver function tests done every three months. The combination of a constant sore throat, the complete exhaustion of chronic fatigue, a tired liver, a digestive system that could not handle food, along with other medical issues, my life had suddenly become very still. When you are focusing on surviving each day and trying desperately to come up with a plan for healing, the buzz of the world outside of yourself becomes quiet. You don’t have time, nor does your body tolerate distractions. My body was calling out for me and I had to listen to it. It wanted all of my attention. My whole life, I had been unkind to my body. In my youth, I had starved it to be thin and had an eating disorder. I had exhausted my body with exercise bulimia for years. I was only allowed to eat if I exercised all of the calories off. I had not listened when my body was begging me for rest. I stayed up too late, ate the wrong things or didn’t eat at all. This new season of stillness awakened me to the understanding that this body, given to me by God, needed more nurturing, love and respect. I had to learn to love myself more fully, take note of all of the abuses that I had done toward my body through the years, look at the reasons behind these actions and have the courage to take one step at a time toward being totally surrendered to God, who knows everything about me and knows my needs.

I spent the entire year of 2019 in recovery, but I gained so much spiritual wisdom about my body, rest, loving myself fully, acceptance, forgiveness and perseverance. I guess that if I had to describe 2019 in one word, it would be “stillness”. I could do nothing but wait, pray and believe. Every dose I took of the medication for my liver made me want to throw up. The doctor said that the side effects from it are so bad that many patients stop taking it, but I confessed with each dose that it was not going to be my new reality. I confessed that God was healing me and that I would be well again. I learned that I was hungry all of the time and could not eat. I learned that food was all around me and had always had a horrible relationship with it. There were family celebrations, picnics, birthdays, dinner dates in 2019 where I was surrounded by food and couldn’t eat. I also learned to feel grateful and feel satisfied with liquid protein, broth and jello. Going through illness is as much a spiritual experience as it is physical. I am now much more conscious of how I care for my body, the emotions I am feeling, my need for rest and nutrient dense food to care for all of the organs in my body. My liver and gastrointestinal system are still in recovery and there are still days when my body can’t handle solid foods, but I am so grateful that God revealed so much to me about recovery.

And so it is, January bids me to step into a new year. Jesus gave me the word, “Cultivate” as I prayed about the coming year, which is “to prepare for, to acquire or develop, to work at to make it better” according to Webster’s Dictionary. So, as I listen to the whispers of the Holy Spirit, I have been reading God’s word, spending time in stillness and praying over the plans and purpose for my life. I am being pulled to more stillness as I write about the wisdom God has imparted to me through adversity and His grace. I am being pulled to a life with less distraction. I am being pulled to help people through practical ministry (meeting physical needs) as well as online ministry. I am not sure how that all looks yet, but this year, my heart is to bring warm, cozy blankets and throws to people who need to feel hugged by God. On my list are 25 young adults in a transitional home for children who have outgrown the foster care system and would otherwise be homeless. I am drawing up plans for a non-profit ministry to help me reach more people with my workbooks, Bible study and so much more. If you want to help me reach my goals for the kids in the transitional home and beyond, the link to my wishlist is below:

Shop My Amazon Ministry Wishlist for 2020 Heart in Hand Project!

Please shop my Amazon wishlist to help me reach my ministry goals for 2020. When you shop from my list, you can check out and Amazon will take care of all of the mailing details. You can even write a message or prayer to be given to the recipient through the checkout on Amazon. I believe that when God is in a thing, He will provide. This is the beginning of something really beautiful that God has put in my heart to cultivate. As a former minister and hospital chaplain, the fun part of this project is that I will be the one delivering each blanket and will have an opportunity to talk with people one on one. For blankets distributed through online correspondence, either myself or my ministry team will have an opportunity to communicate with and follow up with each recipient.

May God bless you in 2020!

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

Prayer and Fasting: What I Have Learned Though Difficulty

November 17, 2019 by Mary

Updated Post From My Old Blogger Blog!

Prayer and Fasting: What I Have Learned Through Difficulty

When we are alone with Christ, one-on-one in the silence, there is an intimacy that reveals unwavering love, compassion, forgiveness and acceptance. Silence is the doorway to peace. No compromise, no questioning, just me….and GOD, one-on-one. Christ, reaching out His hand to bring me comfort.

The disciplines of prayer and fasting are a means for me to make a declaration of my faith in God. I do not fast for great lengths of time, and do not have a standard by which I abide. My choice to fast is between God and I. The practice of fasting is a way to say, “Hello God, you have my undivided attention today. I will depend upon you for my sustenance. I want to feel that you are close to me. I want to be in your presence.” This may mean skipping lunch or restricting myself to only soup and light meals for a day.

While the world spins out of control, and I hear terrible things on the news—of loss and murder, of bombs and tragedy, of hatred, wars, hunger and death…when I am alone with my Creator, everything is beautiful. He took the scars of the world upon his own hands, he wore the thorny crown that pierced the skin, wounded for our transgressions and yet, the God I know, reaches out His hand to me and it is without flaws.

I am certain when during this week I receive a phone call that the grandbaby of my dear friend has been diagnosed with Leukemia, that the boy is in the loving hands of our God; reassured that my very own fears of death pale in comparison to life everlasting. I pray silently that Christ would breathe his warm, soft breath over this boy and into his lungs and the blood that runs through his veins, because He is a God of miracles.

I pray for the hush of silent peace to rush over his mama’s aching heart, and to whirl around his family.

As I commune with God in my fleshly, self-centered way, praying for my own needs, God reveals to me the innermost hurts and burdens of those around me. I am left with a hole inside of me from all of the needs I never noticed because I have not drawn close enough to Christ often enough to see people through His eyes. As He transforms my eyes into His own, I begin to understand and feel more compassion and love for others.

“Hold out your hand“, Christ urges…. I hold out a clenched fist, wrought with human experience. His hand gently opens mine and the heart of stone that I have held onto so tightly becomes like clay. Tears fall like rain, each drop bearing the name of someone I may have missed, overlooked, dismissed, hurt, or abandoned. Each falling tear also representing my own hurts, fears and sadness

And yet, in the midst of my silence, as my spirit is open to receive that which God has for me, He sends messages about my passion and purpose. He reassures me that I still have work to do, yet, it takes me days to realize this message. A friend calls to ignite and renew my passion for a women’s retreat center when she tells me that I can use her farmhouse and 15 acres, left vacant by she and her husband when they moved to the city. Really? God-are you bringing to life something that I have been afraid to dream could possibly happen? The cumulative effect of many disappointments has conditioned me to question God’s plans for me. I realize that this has kept me from living in His fullness. These are ugly truths and I wonder if others have grappled with them too. I have sustained loss after loss, leaving me spiritually paralyzed. Loss has a way of clinging to the inner-most parts of our being, lingering there like a cancer. We rarely recognize the fact that it has never fully left but changed us inside, our DNA so to speak.

White candle flickering, I understand that I must embrace the realization of my ugly truths. It is part of the human experience. As my mind grapples with the depth of my own woundedness, I realize that finding a silent place daily to commune with God is lifeblood to a healthy soul.

A time of prayer and fasting is like going on a retreat with God. Here are some of the things that I have learned:

Intimacy with God requires silence of mind and body
Connection requires an intimate daily relationship with God
Be a seeker of Truth, even when it is painful
When we are willing to face difficult truths in our lives, God’s Grace covers us
God often speaks to us through others
As we begin to see others through the eyes of Christ, we gain wisdom and understanding
He can transform hearts of stone into hearts of clay
He has plans for each of us
God is only a whisper away, yet living in His fullness requires commitment
He will let us know when our work is finished